Postpartum Depression Help for fathers and family members
Seeing your wife or loved one suffer can be painful. You may feel helpless and even guilty. But remember, you did not cause this. You cannot fix it. However, there are a few things to keep in mind and some things you can do.
1. Understand and recognize the symptoms. Signs and symptoms of depression after childbirth vary depending on the type of depression. If you are aware of any of these, you can help the mother understand and get help.
Baby blues
Signs and symptoms of the baby blues — which last only a few days or weeks — may include:
Mood swings
Anxiety
Sadness
Irritability
Crying
Decreased concentration
Trouble sleeping
Postpartum depression
Postpartum depression may appear to be the baby blues at first — but the signs and symptoms are more intense and longer lasting, eventually interfering with your ability to care for your baby and handle other daily tasks. Signs and symptoms of postpartum
depression may include:
Loss of appetite
Insomnia
Intense irritability and anger
Overwhelming fatigue
Loss of interest in sex
Lack of joy in life
Feelings of shame, guilt or inadequacy
Severe mood swings
Difficulty bonding with the baby
Withdrawal from family and friends
Thoughts of harming yourself or the baby
Postpartum psychosis
With postpartum psychosis — a rare condition that typically develops within the first two weeks after delivery — the signs and symptoms are even more severe. Signs and symptoms of postpartum psychosis may include:
Confusion and disorientation
Hallucinations and delusions
Paranoia
Attempts to harm yourself or the baby
2. Help her to get help. You can ask your pediatrician, family doctor, ob/gyn, or other person you trust for recommendations. Finding someone you and your wife both trust, and feel comfortable with, is crucial for recovery. You may want to try to find a support group or therapist. New Moms Connect can provide resources in the Los Angeles area www.aleinu.net. Call 323.761.8800 x1028 and leave a message on the warmline. If you need help outside Los Angeles, go to www.postpartum.net.
3. Please be patient. PPD is not something that can be fixed overnight. It may take a few weeks or it may take a few years for your wife to recover and for your family to heal. Your wife or loved one may not be able to do all the things she used to. Some women reject their husbands, children, family, and friends, and still do not realize they have a serious problem. Some women refuse to talk to their husbands and blame them for all their problems. Do not assume she is "over-reacting" or being "unreasonable”. But in time, and with help, this will pass. Your love and tenderness make a difference.
4. Help your wife or loved one continue treatment even when she starts feeling better. While discontinuing treatment is very tempting once she starts feeling better it can be very dangerous. The chances of relapse are much higher if treatment is stopped too
early.
5. Get help for yourself and your family. Let others know you need help and make sure you take care to find a support network for you.
6. Be there for your family. You may have to take over other roles in the home. Your wife may not be able to shop, cook, clean or care for your other children. If you cannot do this on your own, don’t be ashamed to ask for help.
7. Know when you are in crisis. If your wife is a danger to herself or others, either take her to the emergency room or call 911.
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Warmline: 323-761-8800-x1028 or